What I Want to Be When I Grow Up

Since my last post a few months ago, which was on my 38th birthday, I've been on a roller coaster of highs and lows.  This entry is going to focus on one of those lows and the beautiful result of it.
Over the summer, I decided to stop working in real estate.  Let's face it, I am not a business woman.  I actually started this and another blog because that is what I was told to do  in order to "brand" myself.  In order get a web presence.  First sign that I am not a business woman: I cannot stand the word "brand".  It annoys me immensely.
For the majority of my adult life, I worked in non-profit.  This is where my heart is.  Don't get me wrong: I have nothing against making a profit, or business people for that matter.  Hey, someone has to make the money to donate to the non-profit organizations (NPO).  It's a beautiful symbiotic relationship.  A few years ago, I attended a fundraiser for the LA Free Clinic (now I believe it is called the Saban Free Clinic - thanks to a very generous donation by the Saban Family Foundation, which is one of the NPOs where I used to work).  The honoree of the night, whose name I am embarrassed to say I cannot recall, was the wife of a very rich man.  This enabled her to focus on volunteer work.  She stated it so beautifully (I am paraphrasing a bit): "My husband makes the money, and I spend it."  It was beautiful because she was referring to spending it on philanthropic causes.
Basically, my point is that I will not feel guilty that I am not cut out to dance with the wolves of the business world.  I am proud that I am non-confrontational, that I have a bleeding heart, that I need meaning in my work. Now, don't get me wrong; putting food on the table can give meaning to almost any work.  I am lucky enough that my husband has managed to keep us afloat these last few years, without much financial help from me.  I won't say it hasn't been difficult, which is why I do have to work.  The tension is too much.  And quite honestly, I think I need it for me; for my brain and for my self-esteem.  (This last statement will lead to another blog entry addressing the issue of stay-at-home mom vs. work-out-of-the house mom.)
So, this past Friday, I mailed off my application to California State University, Northridge's Master of Social Work program.  I am scared and excited.  As the mother of three, I'm not sure how I will handle the course and field work, but I will make it happen.  I finally know what I want, can state it proudly and confidently, and can pursue it with vigor.  I feel empowered, which is fitting, since so much of social work is helping populations empower themselves.
With any luck and a lot of hard work, in about 2 1/2 years, I will be able to sign my name as: Dassy Sasson DeBasc, MSW!